Can I Help You?

We went to an event at church tonight, and Kate conked out at the end (as she does).  Because Heather brought her straight there, she had her backpack with her.  We also brought me a chair so that I wouldn't have to sit on the ground (informal seating and RA do not go together).  So, after Cam had put the backpack on (with the straps adjusted to the size of a tallish seven-year-old), he picked up the sleeping kid in all her floppiness, and tried to get the chair.  I was having a fun game of see-how-long-it-takes-Cam-to-get-frustrated when Gavin (he of the killer sideburns) stepped in and offered to carry the chair.  Then I asked Cam to carry my purse.  Because I'm evil.
We got out to the car, got the chair into the trunk, and bid farewell and thank-you to Gavin.  Cam got Kate into the back seat, and I climbed into the driver's seat.  After a few seconds, Cam came around to my window and knocked on it.  Thinking that maybe he wanted to drive, I rolled down the window and said, "MmmYes?  Can I help you?"  His response, with a very hangdog look:  "I can't get the backpack off."
Now, a thoughtful wife would get out of the car and help him.  As has already been discussed, I'm an evil wife.  I laughed for about two minutes straight as he wiggled and thrashed and finally freed himself from the backpack.

Yummy Smells (and not so yummy)

I love the little scented wax melts that make your whole house smell good.

So, I'm getting one going today, and I asked Kate which one I should use.

Me: Warm Vanilla Creme?

Cam: Potato?

Me: Cinnamon Stick?

Cam: Wet Dog?

Me:  Ignore him.  Gingerbread?

Cam: Sweaty Sailor?

Kate: I like the Vanilla one.  It smells like the ice cream bars I like.

I love how my kid joined me in ignoring the weirdo behind us and continued on with choosing a smell.

Rub *what* on my back?

So, last night, I was achy.  (If you haven't gotten the news, I have Fibromyalgia and Rheumatoid Arthritis, and it's hitting mostly in my upper back and neck.)
Cam: You want me to rub some of that Aspartame into your back?
Me: I don't recommend rubbing any artificial sweetener into someone's skin.
(It's called Aspercreme.  It's like BenGay, but unscented.)